Anxiety is Not an Excuse to be an Asshole

Nicky Cullen
2 min readFeb 15, 2022

This is by no means exclusive — far from it. That said, it’s present enough to warrant speaking to, so fuck it, I’ll speak to it.

One of the biggest complaints said assholes have is that they’ve been treated like shit by an asshole, whether it be family, friends, employer, colleagues, lovers, etc.

Somewhere somehow, someone hurt them. So they feel morally justified to do on to others the same.

I marvel at those who feel such shitty behaviour is justified because they’ve had a hard life.

It’s justification to get help, seek compassion, distance yourself from other assholes, and not feel shame for having to ask for help. It is NOT an excuse to be an asshole.

The irony is while they see themselves as victims, their victims are often those that care for, love, support, and want the best for them.

And because most people won’t put up with shitty behaviour, they double down and start throwing tantrums when things don’t go their way.

It’s a vicious cycle.

“People are assholes. They don’t care. So, I’ll be an asshole to protect myself and prove I’m right because, well, I’m crafty like that and I must protect my ego at all cost.”

But there is a cost.

Those who once cared will care no more. The silly games and manipulations and calculated behaviour will no longer be tolerated.

I know it’s a pattern or whatever, and trust issues or whatever, and how you’ve learned to meet your needs, and hurt people hurt people, but at the end of the day, it’s this: you’re being an asshole. And while you crave respect, you’re making it damn hard for others to respect you.

Friends and loved ones are entirely within their right to distance themselves. In the very same way, you are entirely within your right to walk away from anyone who treats you like shit.

Life is too short — — pissing and moaning and whining and NOT doing a damn thing to change can only be tolerated for so long.

The solution is simple: If you’re treating people like shit because you’re not happy — stop. Focus on addressing the underlying issues instead. And if you’re surrounded by assholes who treat you like shit — demand better and walk away if they refuse to comply.

Just a thought.

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Nicky Cullen

Stress Coach | Helping legend overcome anxiety and stress. 👉